American Idol: My Top 10 Evaluation

Last night America voted, and tonight, after another excruciating long and drawn out results show, we are down to the top ten contestants. These ten will not only go forward and compete for the coveted title of American Idol, but all ten will be featured in the national American Idol Tour which takes places after the winner is crowned. So I think this is an appropriate time to give my own opinions on the talents and abilities of the ten remaining contestants.

But before I do that, let me make one thing clear. This season in no way compares to last season, or many seasons before that. Perhaps I'm spoiled because last season was just so damn good, but I simply cannot understand how at this point in the competition, so many contestants still have pitch problems. The first thing you need to be able to do to be a talented vocal performer is to be able to hear a pitch and repeat it. If you can't do that simple task, you don't deserve to be on stage in front of millions and millions of people singing for a shot at worldwide fame and fortune. It's truly absurd, and leads me to believe that the judges put too much focus on "star quality" and "image" and "IT factor" in the preliminary rounds, and end up eliminating people with better voices because they may not look or feel like they could be pop icons. I find it hard to believe that there weren't other people in the Hollywood rounds who are better singers than some of the people who have made it this far.

Anywho, here are my personal evaluations of the top ten contestants...

Andrew Garcia: Not a fan. This guy had one strong performance during the early stages of this show (the oft praised but perhaps overrated acoustic cover of Paula Abdul's "Straight Up"). Ever since then, he has been in a complete downward spiral, and I think it is only his jolly personality and unique look that is keeping the voters calling. To be honest, he does have an interesting timbre to his voice, and isn't as pitchy as some of the remaining contestants, but his range is limited and I think he is running out of ideas. On top of all that, his performance this week was cheese-tastic. Spot's Advice: Bring back your acoustic guitar, take away the back up music, but this time, slow it down. Get vulnerable and connect with the audience.

Crystal Bowersox: All I have to say is wow, wow, wow. Best in show thus far, without a doubt. Let's put it this way: this past week, Crystal sang "Me & Bobby McGee" by Janis Joplin. This is so NOT an American Idol song, but you know what? She took a classic song that I don't think anyone below the age of 16 would have ever heard before and made it relevant and sang it like an absolute all star. In other words, she killed it, just like she does every week! I absolutely love her, though I kind of agree with the judges only criticism that she needs to let loose a little more and connect more with the crowd. But she mentioned that she has some "big plans" for next week, and seeing as how the theme is R&B, I am very interested to see what she pulls out of her street-performer bag of tricks. Spot's Advice: I'd like to see something sans guitar, but honestly, I have no complaints. Keep doin' it and doin' it and doin' it well.

Didi Benami: So she isn't the best singer in the competition, but gosh darn it, I am head over heels in love with this chick. Not only is she drop dead gorgeous, but I also find her voice extremely sexy. Yes, she has some pitch problems, and yes, she isn't exactly original. But the judges have been going way to hard on Didi. Perhaps this past week's performance of "You're No Good" was little musical theater, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't blushing by the end of it (especially that face she made at the very end, wow-wee). No matter what the judges say, Didi is going to make to the top six, if on her sex appeal alone. Spot's Advice: She found the most success with her touching performance of Fleetwood Mac's "Rhiannon," so perhaps the best bet is something slow and acoustic. Nora Jones, anyone?

Lee Dewyze: People love this guy, and I want to, but I'm simply not smitten yet. He reminds me a lot of Danny Gokey from last season (who made it to the top three, for those of you who don't know). Very similar raspy-sounding voice, and he is beginning to let loose and show some energy up there, which I definitely appreciate. But his pitch problems and his limited range are holding him back. The judges really eat him up, and so does America, but I'm just not sold that he has the goods to go the distance until he works out his issues with pitch. Spot's Advice: Gotta focus on hitting those notes instead of sounding like a big gruff man-cake. Don't sacrifice accuracy for style and you could easily hit the top five.

Mike Lynche: Probably the best male vocalist. He's technically sound, has a great personality, and really knows himself as an artist. Very much the Reuben Studdard of this season, Mike is another fan favorite. My only worry is that his whole act is getting kind of stale. It's always a big, powerful soul ballad with some playful falsetto and nice vocal riffs. And while the judges like when the artists are true to themselves, I think America may get bored if we don't get a little variety from him. I mean, it is the spice of life, after all. Spot's Advice: It's not necessarily a style change we need, but a genre change. I'd love to see Mike rock out on a huge rock and roll song, and America will savor the diversity.

Siobhan Magnus: What a shocker, this one. This girl is one of the strangest, most awkward people I've ever watched on television. It's almost painful to watch her make impromptu conversation with Seacrest before and after she performs. But holy crap can this girl belt it out. Definitely the first contestant to have a real "WOW" moment (or as I like to call it: "pulling a Lambert"), I was all aboard the Siobhan railroad for the weeks prior, always excited to hear what crazy note she'd hit next. And while I still think she has some amazing pipes, this week left a sour taste in my mouth. It's like she is now relying on that scream-belt throughout the entire song, instead of building to it and letting it be the peak that it should be. This week, it was all just very sloppy and kind of phoned in. But she's got the talent to take her into the top 3, as long as America can stand her awkwardness. Spot's Advice: Choose your moments wisely. Every song should have a peak and a valley. Find the balance between too little and too much and you'll be here for a long time.

Casey James: Casey is a tough one to peg down. The only thing I can say with full confidence is that he is far and away the best guitarist to grace the stage. And while this does help his image and personality, American Idol is at its purest a singing competition. But that's not to say he doesn't have a good voice. It's just that, with all the rocking guitar, it's been a while since I've really heard it. I really liked him this past week, and I think he's got a much better range than Lee and Andrew, so he's got potential. And if my girlfriend is any measuring stick, he is apparently some sort of surfer-dude heartthrob. But until I hear more of his voice, I can't be sure on how long he'll last. Spot's Advice: Take next week's R&B theme as a chance to show off your voice, not your skills with an axe. Show the judges that you are more than a good guitarist and your stock will surely rise.

Aaron Kelly: I am see-sawing big time on this kid. On the one hand, I can't take him seriously. It's like David Archuletta all over again. He's a little 16-year old boy, and I can't help but feel like when he's on stage, his mother is backstage jumping up and down screaming things like "smile," "stand up straight," and "open your mouth big on those high notes." And before he made it to the top 12, I was ready for him to ship off. However, he has made a HUGE comeback since then, with a much more grown up look and 100% better song choices. In truth, the kid has undeniable talent (short of some pitch problems), and I'd like to see him continue forward and keep developing himself as an artist. And if he keeps showing up like he did last night (with laryngitis no less), he should last a few more weeks easily. Spot's Advice: Know your voice and pick the right songs for it. Something heartfelt and slow but with some power notes to belt out. Use last night as a guide and don't look back.

Tim Urban: Total snoozefest. The judges absolutely hate him, and I totally see why. He brings nothing fresh or original to the table. And last night's super corny floor sliding and reaching out to the audience was assuredly the nail in his coffin. However, there is one thing positive I can say about Tim, something my roommate and I realized during his performance yesterday: he isn't painful to listen to. In other words, the kid has a pleasant sounding voice, and unlike many of the other contestants, he doesn't really have pitch problems. But he's just so darn vanilla, he simply can't and won't last much longer. And cut your damn hair! It's worse than mullet boy Alex Lambert! Spot's Advice: Sing "Hallelujah" again. Hah. But seriously, that was the only thing that I've seen from you that was anything close to a winning performance.

Katie Stevens: Another example of someone who I really should love, but just am not completely sold on yet. Another teenager, this girl sings with a voice three times her age. It's deep, heavy, soulful, and at times, extremely powerful. However, I think she would do well from a bit more vocal training. She seems to have sub-par breath support which tends to interfere with her pitches. Also, and maybe it's just me, but sometimes it sounds like she is forcing the sound out through her eyes, not her diaphragm. It's hard to explain without listening to it, but it can sound very pushed. These criticisms aside, I do like her and think she is in the top half of the group as far as natural talent goes. And if she cleans up her vocals just a little bit more, I'll be totally and completely sold. Spot's Advice: You've got song choice down, there are just some minor technical kinks to work out. Focus on phrasing and you'll be around to see the top six without a doubt.

So there you have my opinions, but I'd love to hear your take! And as far as my pick for who gets the boot next week, if it's not either Tim or Andrew, there will be hell to pay, America. HELL!!

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Big wheels keep on turnin'...

Reader's Editorial , vol. 2: Where your DVR should be on a Saturday Night (by JAZ)

[The following article was submitted by one of our faithful readers: JAZ. If you are interested in submitting your own article, click here for more information about our weekly reader's editorial. Enjoy!]

In college it was unheard of to stay in on a Saturday night, even after a day of football pregame drinking. However, now that those years are behind (some of) us, once in a while I have found myself at home on a Saturday night, but I'm not disappointed. I have taken the opportunity to tune into SNL, a show I have not watched since I first got my drivers license. However with constant headlines of political and celebrity scandals, SNL is fresh and doesn’t have to go far for current and hysterical material.

The two tiered cast consists of the more experienced comedians like Will Forte and Fred Armisen, mixed with some newer "featured players" like Nasim Pedrad and Abby Elliott. While I could write about each of the actors and their individual talents, I have chosen to spotlight my favorite female and male cast member, incase you have not been watching.

FEMALE: Since her debut to SNL in 2005, veteran Kristen Wiig has proven to be one of the most versatile and successful comedians since Amy Poehler, and her characters have proven themselves SNL worthy by reoccurring in multiple episodes and even having their own hour-long specials. After her first season, SNL’s large budget cut shrunk the cast, however Wiig was promoted to full time cast member and characters Penelope, the one-upper, and schoolgirl Gilly became highlighted segments. In this past season, Wiig and Fred Armisen guest star on Seth Meyer’s weekend update where the two improvise entire songs with Wiig following Armisen's every word and hand motions. This duo has been invited back twice to Weekend Updated because it showcases Wiig’s natural improvisational abilities and quick comedic timing that simply cannot always be taught. While in the last guest appearance she broke character to laugh at herself, audiences appreciate seeing Kristen Wiig is having a good time.

MALE: As for me, my renewed interest came after Andy Samberg's SNL digital shorts popularity. Sure, it helped that his co-star was triple threat Justin Timberlake, but even his cast only digital shorts such as "Jammies" and "Flags of the world" proved Andy Samberg's raw talent and Jewish funnyman sex appeal. Andy was discovered as part of musical parody troupe "The Lonely Island" with hits "We like sports" and "Having a good time"- both worth a visit to Hulu or YouTube. Now the troupe is part of SNL, and has graced us with known favorites “Lazy Sunday” and “I’m on a Boat”

New this year, SNL has allowed guests to be both the musical guest and host starting with Grammy winner Taylor Swift. Jennifer Lopez followed and had the second highest ratings this season, provinfg that musical guests deserve a chance to show off their acting skills. Past host and musical guest Justin Timberlake seems to be the gold standard of hosting, however Neil Patrick Harris came very close according to ratings.

While with any type of comedy, the segments can be hit or miss, and a minute or two too long, this cast has old and new characters that could easily turn into more SNL spin-off movies. So, while there is no need to cancel your Saturday night plans, get your DVR’s ready, and if you miss it, there’s always On Demand. The only question the remains is, what does Kel Mitchell think of Kenan Thompson’s success?

Reader's Editorial , vol. 1: Good Show Gone Bad (by HRW)

[The following article was submitted by one of our faithful readers: HRW. If you are interested in submitting your own article, click here for more information about our weekly reader's editorial. Enjoy!]

When it debuted in the fall of 2007, Gossip Girl was just what young, hip television viewers had been craving.  It had all of the quintessential elements of a teen-drama – good looking actors and actresses, a high school setting, trend setting fashions, and of course…the kid from the other side of the tracks (or in this case, bridge) who just wants to be a part of the cool crowd.  But Gossip Girl brought so much more to the table than Dawson’s Creek or (the original) 90210 ever could…namely sex, drugs, lots of drama, and the most glamorous, fabulous setting that any television show could have…New York City. 

The first two seasons of the show were awesome…but then, the GG crew graduated from high school, and, following in the footsteps of our friends at Dawson’s, 9-0, and, even Saved by the Bell…they went to college.  Dum dum duuuuuummmmmm..\ Shouldn’t this be the nail in the coffin for a show about high school students? Now, with the right writing, and casting changes, some shows can survive this massive transition, and in the fall, when GG returned for season 3, I initially thought that the show was better without the constraints of high school….plus with Chuck Bass drinking martinis every week, it was finally at least somewhat believable.  There were a few little things that were bothering me though…namely the casting of Hillary Duff as Dan’s love interest who is a Mary-Kate Olsen type character -- a movie star who attends NYU to try to be “normal.”  Plain and simple, she’s annoying…and not even that hot!  I mean, it was hardly plausible when Nate and Dan were basically swooning over her…they are prettier than she is!  Anyway, I made it through the first half of season three, and when it went on hiatus over the winter I was satisfied…

But then, last night happened.  At 9pm Gossip Girl returned for the second half of its third season, and I was honestly so excited.  I wanted to see some drama.  I was ready for it.  But about twenty minutes in, I found myself looking at the clock.  What was once one of the most dramatic and controversial shows on TV was, dare I say….BORING!  Here are my complaints:

1. EVERYONE is the village bicycle.  Seriously….it’s only the third season, and already everyone has slept with (or at least hooked up) with everyone else.  Nate has basically been with every female character on the show.  Chuck has hooked up with everyone but Serena (who is his half-sister….so that would be gross), he had a quasi-fling with Vanessa (even though it was to trick her…or something), and remember in episode 1 when he tried to make out with Jenny on the roof?  Dan has been with everyone but Blair (they would kill each other) and Jenny (sister…gross)….I mean it’s really is getting a bit ridiculous.  I think that the moment in last night’s episode that highlighted it best was when Dan and Nate were sharing tips about hooking up with Vanessa and Serena, while Blair and Serena were simultaneously having the same conversation about Nate.

2. Chuck and Blair are actually a happy couple!  To that I say…how annoying!  I mean, when they initially got together, I was ecstatic…after two seasons of playing mind games with one another, the two least likely to settle down characters finally, well, settled down…with each other!  But it seems as if it’s all going a bit too well….so much so that I am not even interested in their story line anymore.  Chuck’s whole searching for his mother thing pales in comparison to Jenny’s new stint as a drug dealer! Which brings me to my next point…

3. The most interesting story line on the whole show is that Jenny is a drug dealer.  Who would have thought that Little J would steal the spotlight from her former mentor (and tormentor….see what I did there?) the Queen B herself.  But again, to this I say, who cares?  I could write this story myself!  Jenny deals drugs for sleazy short guy with overly gelled quaff, whose father is some Belgian ambassador or something important and stupid; Jenny sleeps with sleazy short guy; Jenny gets caught dealing drugs and/or sleeping with sleazy short guy by either a) her father, b) Dan, or c) Lilly; Jenny rebels against her family and runs away, or at least tries to, and then we find her dancing topless in some apartment somewhere….oh, wait, didn’t that happen already?

Exactly my point.  I’m sorry to say it GG fans, but I think that our beloved show has jumped the shark and is about to see it demise.  Either that or it will just continue on without a following…you know, like One Tree Hill.  Which just goes to show that you can’t send high school kids to college…except for real high school kids….they should definitely go to college, otherwise they could end up like Dylan McKay, and we all know how that turns out.

Music Lovers Unite: A Look At Upcoming Music Festivals

Imagine waking up in a tent with a couple of your best friends.  You have mud smeared across your cheeks, an absurd amount of dirt built up under your fingernails and a hangover that would force Dennis Rodman to swear off alcohol for the rest of his life.  In the background, you hear a band jamming and the general noise of thousands of people getting their day started.  You contemplate changing clothes and/or brushing your teeth and head to the nearest food tent to get a nutella and banana crepe, washing it down with your first brew of the day.  This was Day 2 of the Deputy's visit to Germany's annual festival called Hurricane in Scheissel, Germany.  Sounds fun right?

In the upcoming months, many festivals like Hurricane are popping up all over the globe and the Deputy is going to try to highlight some of the contenders for the Most Wanted List of Music Festivals this season.

On April 16th- April 18th, California hosts one of the most popular music festivals at the Empire Polo fields in Indio, California, near the Palm Springs area.  This festival boasts some of the biggest performers on their main stage but also provides different "tents" that play a wide array of different music and can provide some relief from the exhausting heat.  Some of the past headliners have included everyone from Bjork, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Prince, Radiohead, Nine Inch Nails and most shockingly the Rage Against the Machine Reunited performance.  This year the line up stars Jay-Z, Tiesto, Muse, Gorillaz, Them Crooked Vultures, MGMT, Yo La Tengo and De La Soul.

The line-up looks amazing but there are some skeptics as to this year's focus.  In the past, the headliners have been big names in the alternative, pop or electronic genres that are heavy hitters and cater to the hippie culture of these types of festivals.  With Jay-Z and a plethora of electronic/techno artists, it seems that this year is going to attract a whole new breed of audiences.  I am a huge fan of this year but some say that it isn't in the Coachella spirit.  Spirit or not, you can expect the Deputy all over the main stages and possibly passed out mid-day with a tattoo on my forehead that says, "TAKE ME HOME!"

This is a four-day, camping festival planted in the middle of Machester, Tennessee on a 700 acre farm.  The festival website discusses the variety of music genres they attract (from hip-hop to jazz to electronica) and even provides a "town" that surrounds the campsite that provides arcades, cinema, comedy clubs, jazz clubs and more to round out this amazing June festival experience.  Rolling Stone Magazine named this festival as one of the top 50 moments that changed the history of rock and roll.  

The Line up is to include Jay-Z (again), Dave Matthews Band, Kings of Leon, Stevie Wonder, Weezer, Nora Jones, Thievery Corporation and even The Flaming Lips playing The Dark Side of the Moon.  This line-up, though noteworthy, is not even close to Coachella standards.  I don't think it can compare to the heavy-hitters and innovators that Coachella can attract, but it definitely provides more of an entertainment variety that makes for an unforgettable weekend.

A train takes you from Hamburg to a desolate station in Scheissel.  There is no station when the train stops so if you don't speak German, you have to blindly follow the masses of people in backpacks and tent bags to the camping site which is set up like a little neighborhood of music lovers and party-goers.  It is a twin music festival and shares a lot of the big line-ups with the Southside Music festival in the South of Germany.  

The line-up includes Coheed and Cambria, BeatSteaks (a German staple, really good band), Jack Johnson, La Roux, Stone Temple Pilots, The Get Up Kids and The Strokes.  Though the line-up is littered with German bands that you have never heard of, that adds to the fun and allure of this festival.  Everyone speaks English and meeting the locals is half the fun.  So if you find yourself in the area during June 12-14th, remember Hurricane.

(Critic's Choice)

This line-up is fun, this line-up is sick, I wanna take a ride on this line-up's disco's stick.  Not really but you get where I'm headed.  The name of this festival alone is enough to draw anyone to buy a ticket.  The festival started when Perry Farrell of Jane's Addiction made the festival as a farewell performance for his band.  It fell off from being a touring festival and then was revived by the same originators in 2003 and has set its roots in Grant Park in Illinois.  

The line-up is too amazing to list every performer but just to wet your whistle:  Depeche Mode, Tool, Jane's Addiction, Kings of Leon, Snoop Dogg, Rise Against, Animal Collective, Arctic Monkeys, Passion Pit, Atmosphere, and a whole lot more.  This would be the Deputy's choice for this summer's must-attend festival for August 7-9.  It resembles more of an older-Coachella line-up and may be the better choice if you do not have robot ears to enjoy Coachella's 2010 electro-heavy bands.

Check out the sites for tickets and suggestions for attendance.  See you there!  

1,500 Hits!

Rollin, rolllin, rollin down the river...

Quote-osaurus: NBC Thursday Night Comedies, 3/11/10

Welcome to my new segment, "Quote-osaurus," where I watch a night of television shows and then repeat my favorite funny quotes so you can enjoy them too! I will also be picking my favorite episode from that night so you know what to track down on Hulu if you for some reason don't DVR every single show on TV (like I do). First up, my favorite night of comedy television, NBC Thursdays. Here are the best quotes from last night's episodes of Community, Parks and Recreation, The Office, and 30 Rock!

Community- "Basic Genealogy"

Shirley: I'm so excited for everyone to meet my sons.
Abed: I hope they're not twins; twins freak me out. They always know what the other one is...
Troy: Thinking.
Abed: Yeah. And they're always finishing eachother's...
Troy: Pie.
Abed: It's creepy.

Shirley: Your heart is desensitized, Jeff. You're like a machine that feels no love, just sex. You're like the Bootynator. You know, the Bootynator, like "I'll be back," but with booty.
Troy: Why would the Bootynator be back with booty, wouldn't he just try and kill it?
Abed: Well maybe he kills it and brings it back as a trophy.
Annie: Why would he want dead booty?
Troy: I want pirate's booty.

Abed's Father: Look at this! You are a bad mother! Now I have to go to the car and get my emergency shirt. And I don't even like that shirt!

Pierce [playing Pictionary]: Smiling sideways vagina!
Amber: No.
Pierce: Happy sideways vagina!

Pierce [comforting Jeff]: It's ok, it's ok. Let it out.
Jeff: We always used to watch the shows she wanted to watch. I hate Glee.
Pierce: Yeah, I'm not crazy about Glee either.
Jeff [sobbing]: I hate it. I don't understand the appeal at all.

Parks and Recreation- "The Possum" (Spot's Pick: best episode of the night)

April [to camera]: Andy recently diagnosed himself with what he calls "Shoeshine Head." It's when you shine too many shoes and the fumes create a thunderstorm in your brain. Cures include coffee, cheeseburgers, and napping on the floor.

Leslie: Eugene! Boy, we have a really important job for you.
Eugene: We'll get to it first thing Monday.
Leslie: ...today's Wednesday. Look, this is not a request.
Andy: We are acting under direct orders from Mayor Gunderson's dog.
Leslie: Office.

Tom [to camera]: I used to love Tiger Woods because he was a great champion. But after that sex scandal, that man is a god!

Mark: Ron, none of this is up to code . . . there's no drainage, doesn't seem to be any ventilation, you've got hazardous chemicals over here.
Ron: Yeah, which only I am breathing. It's the same liberty which gives me the right to fart in my car. Are you gonna tell a man he can't fart in his own car?

Andy [to camera]: By day, Andy Dwyer, shoe shinest. By other time of day, Andy Radical, possum tackler. And by night...do whatever I want. No job.

Andy: I lived in the pit for the better part of last year, and I made some vermin friends. You know what, "friends" sounds stupid. Colleagues. They are bad at sharing, but good at tag.

Leslie: Here's the thing, Evelyn. We're not sure that the possum we caught is in fact Fairway Frank.
Evelyn: Leslie, whoever it is, it's a possum. And the sooner it's dead, the sooner the mayor can do what he wants with it.
Leslie: Does he want to have sex with a dead possum?
Evelyn: No, he's not a monster. He wants to stuff it and hang it above the urinal in his office bathroom so that little flecks of pee can get on it forever.
Leslie: Ewww.

The Office- "St. Patrick's Day"

Michael: Hello hello. Top of the mornin' to ya! Ooo, green M'n'Ms! Nature's Viagra. Two of my favorite joke areas combined. It's gonna be a good day.

Michael [to camera]: It is St. Patrick's Day. And here at Scranton that is a huge deal. It is the closest that the Irish will ever get to Christmas.

Erin: Nice kilt.
Andy: Thanks. It's actually my sister's old field hockey skirt.

Dwight [to camera]: They say that no man is an island. False. I am an island, and this island is volcanic. And itmis about to erupt with the molten hot lava of strategy.

[Erin sneezes]
Angela: Are you sick.
Erin: No, I just have a little indigestion.
Angela: In your nose?
Erin: Yes.

Michael [to camera]: Do I really want to turn out like Gabe? 26, single, tied to my desk, no life, no family. I'd want to have been married by the time I would have turned 30. That's just...that's just depressing.

30 Rock- "Future Husband"

Liz: When you were watching me after my oral surgery, did I put a toaster waffle in my DVD player?
Jack: You did. You watched it for about an hour, said Nicole Kidman should get an Oscar for it, and then turned it off.
Liz: Yikes, thanks for babysitting me.
Jack: I did my best, but you were pretty far gone. You kept trying to order in-home massages off Craigslist.

Kenneth: Oh, Mr. Rositano called to say that he overslept, and that I should make up an excuse for him. So here it goes: on his way to work, Mr. Rositano found some magic beans, and because he believed in them...
Liz: Shut it.

Liz: Oh come on, I mean, you're not really a doctor.
Dr. Kaplan: Well if that's how you feel, then you're not really a patient. And people who aren't patients don't get toys from the treat bucket.
Liz: But there's a Batman in there!
Dr. Kaplan: Yeah, and if you wind him up, he swims in the bath.
Liz: Damn you, Kaplan!

Jack: Avery, I have some information for you, but in exchange I need you to do something for me.
Avery: Like I told you last night, no. Why would you even want to braid my hair?
Jack: Because it's romantic and I am very good at it. But this is strictly professional.

Jenna: If I wanted to see a black guy make a fool of himself, I'd have sex with K-Fed again.

Kenneth: I'm either really happy, or I'm having a really bad donkey-spell.

The End of 24: Reactions

So it seems the Now-Sour Jack Bauer Hour (also known as 24) is coming to a close. After 8 seasons and 192 hours of tragedy, terrorism, and political torment, rumor has it that Jack will be hanging up his CTU badge and retiring that whisper-scream he loves so much. Or, at least that's what every major news outlet is reporting (including Perez Hilton, IGN, and Variety). And as a long time fan who has stood by Jack's side through the death of his wife, his battles against Nina Myers, his heroin addiction, his conflict with the Chinese government, the assassination of David Palmer, his daddy issues, and his short stint working with the FBI, this information leaves me with very mixed feeling. It is always upsetting when a long running show that has been a mainstay in your DVR rotation falls by the wayside. This is especially true of a show like 24, which arguably revolutionized the prime-time action/drama genre with its real-time format and willingness to deal with hot-button issues like terrorism and torture.

However, in the back of my mind, I know that 24's golden age is well behind us. No matter how much it pains me to admit, the truth of the matter is that the 24 formula has been stale since the end of Season 5, and though Season 7's new setting and fresh cast gave me hope for a rebirth of the show, this season has truly set that beeping yellow clock on snooze. The show's problems are numerous. First of all, some of the scenarios are just ridiculously absurd. For example, recently this season, a terrorist strapped with a suicide bomb infiltrates a hospital in an attempt to murder someone with valuable information about a pending nuclear threat (an airtight plan, clearly). After CTU manages to disable the explosives remotely using radio waves (really?), the terrorist jumps out of a window, plummets three stories, and hits the hard concrete. Of course, he survives that fall, coming away with what appears to only be a sprained ankle (I guess...). Jack follows closely behind, chasing the limping terrorist at full, unhampered speed. However, Jack is not able to catch up to the hobbling villain (oh come on), who manages to conveniently find his way to a decompression chamber (are you serious?), which he locks himself inside of so he can begin rewiring the bomb for detonation by hand (right, because he's an explosives expert). Jack then manages to get the terrorist to surrender and come out of the chamber by threatening to kill his mother (say what?), but when the villain opens the chamber and submits, some other terrorists use the "fail safe" frequency to detonate the bomb remotely (...uh...). And after a conveniently placed digital display ticks down for 60 to zero (you know, because all suicide bombs come with these fancy clocks), the terrorist explodes into a million pieces.

I mean, even the worst action movies don't reach these levels of absurdity, and the ones that do don't taken themselves serious enough for us to really hold major objections. And it seems that is exactly what 24's problem is: it takes itself way too seriously. Perhaps this is a necessary result of the subject matter. Of course, no one would be happy if depictions of terrorism and torture weren't treated with the proper levels of gravity and seriousness. But if this is in fact the case, and we as viewers are supposed to  believe what is happening and respect its seriousness, then the 24 writers need to reevaluate their grip on how things work in the "real world."  There is no remaining semblance of reality, and reality is completely necessary when a show takes itself as seriously as 24 does.

But let's be clear: Jack Bauer is not the problem for me. I have no qualms about watching a near-superhuman character like Jack save the day time after time. But, again, it is how seriously everything is taken that rubs me the wrong way. For example, let's use an analogy to Christopher Chance from FOX's Human Target. Or better yet, let's think to James Bond. When either of these characters pull off a fantastic stunt, they do so with a wink, a smile, and usually some tongue-in-cheek quip. But when Jack manages to escape capture by electrocuting a guy with his bare feet, we get no pause, no moment of "phew, that was a close one," no recognition whatsoever that what just happened was really amazing.

Perhaps being less serious wouldn't be the answer. Maybe the same level of seriousness would work better if the show was more grounded in reality. But as it stands with the most recent seasons, the balance between reality and seriousness is terribly out of whack. And for me, the damage is done. Will I watch the rest of Season 8? Probably. Will I be upset when the show doesn't return next season? Maybe. Do I think the departure of 24 from FOX's lineup is warranted? Definitely.

And with that, I bid farewell to Jack and the CTU crew. We had a good run, and I'll never forget the good times.

Oscar Spotting with The Spot

7:48pm- I can't tell what is making me wince in pain more: Barbara Walters' pre-show interview of Sandra Bullock ("Is it pronounced Sandra or Sondra?"), or the realization that there are many people who are unable to watch the Oscars tonight because of the ongoing battle between Cablevision and ABC. For many people, being unable to watch the Academy Awards is an absolute tragedy. Perhaps the biggest night of the year for pop culture, this year's ceremony seems to be even more exciting than usual. The stage is set for a hilarious show hosted by two comedic geniuses who, after working together in a few episodes of 30 Rock as well as the romantic comedy It's Complicated, have a chemistry all their own: Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin. Furthermore, the best picture category may in itself hold the answer to one of the biggest questions in film-making. With front runners Avatar and The Hurt Locker battling for the coveted golden statue, it seems we may finally see what makes a better movie: an epic tale and a huge production budget, or subtle indie emotion and drama. And yet a large portion of my friends and family are currently unable to watch. It's hard to say who's fault it is, really, but regardless, it sucks that the FCC hasn't stepped in and ended all of these struggles. Basic cable channels should be available to everyone, regardless of their service provider. I'm sure its not that simple, but come on, this is ridiculous. Oh well. If you missed the show, you can follow along here, as I give you the minute-to-minute rundown.

8:03pm- On the red carpet now, and the best supporting actress nominees are lined up and being interviewed. Besides an awkward exchange between Mo'Nique and Maggie Gyllenhaal (yes, Mo, your feet are indeed on the ground), only one thing really stands out: Vera Farmiga's dress! Not that I'm much of a fashion buff, but that thing is terrifying. It's like a scarlet doily tornado is tearing her limb from limb! Somebody save her! Oh well, Anna Kendrick looks good; that girl has some career ahead of her.

8:10pm- Is it just me, or is Helen Mirren simply a British version of Meryl Streep? Or maybe it's the other way around...

8:16pm- Evidence that the world is ending #1: before cutting to commercial, we catch glimpses of the following celebrities walking the red carpet: the visionary James Cameron, followed by goof-ball genius Quentin Tarantino, and then...Taylor Lautner!? Come on, ABC...

8:18pm- Evidence that the world is ending #2: ...and then we get a commercial featuring Whoopi Goldberg talking about how she wets herself. Really?

8:27pm- Red Carpet just wrapped. I can't wait to see what Martin and Baldwin have in store for us...

8:33pm- NPH! No way! The song could have been funnier, but it was just campy enough for my taste.

8:38pm- Baldwin and Martin's opening comedy act was a huge success. Highlights for me: Martin's joke about Meryl Streep collecting Nazi memorabilia, the comment about Precious being a video game adaptation, and Baldwin's multiple death stares at George Clooney. Don't know if Sam Worthington really enjoyed the segment with those floating jellyfish things from Avatar, though. He looked a little confused. Oh well.

8:44pm- And the award for best supporting actor goes to...wow, these clips sure are long. Have they always been this elaborate? But oh well, the award goes to...Christoph Waltz! Wait a second...what is this scrolling bottom line announcement!? This is so rude and ridiculous. No body is listening to Waltz's speech anymore, they are just calling all their friends who have Cablevision to tell them they can now watch the awards. Don't get me wrong, this resolution between ABC and Cablevision is a good thing. But come on! Not in the middle of this guy's speech. I really hated that. But either way, congrats to Waltz, its a shame ABC just overshadowed your victory with their own.

8:56pm- Cameron Diaz (who looks absolutely stunning, by the way) and Steve Carrel are up to introduce the nominees for best animated picture...AND THAT DAMN ANNOUNCEMENT IS BACK! Ridiculous...alright I'm over it. But the award for best animated feature film goes to...Up! That dog Dug is hilarious: "I will explore this now...(sniffs the camera)...this is not food." Priceless.

9:00pm- I hate to stoop this low, but...IT'S MILEY! She needs to get her teeth fixed, but Amanda Seyfried looks hot. And the award for best original song in a motion picture goes to..."The Weary Kind" from Crazy Heart. T-Bone Burnett look like James Cameron crossed with Frankenstein! ::Shutters::

9:12pm- Wow, there probably isn't a pair of people who represent what I love about Hollywood today more than this duo: Tina Fey and Robert Downey, Jr. Great rapport between the two of them, and I love Downey's blue bow-tie and matching sunglasses. And wow, Tina Fey, good job with that awkward screenplay reading. And the winner for best screenplay is...Mark Boal for The Hurt Locker. So that's Bomb Squad-1, Blue People-0, for those of your keeping score at home.

9:18pm- RIP John Hughes. Such classic, genre-defining films: The Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Weird Science, Home Alone, and the list goes on. Also, great line by, Broderick: "Hey Ferris, is this your day off?" I really like this segment; a very tasteful walk down memory lane with an iconic filmmaker.

9:27pm- Zoe Saldana: gorgeous girl, ugly dress. Fine from the waste up, but below that, it's like a skirt made out of skinned Muppets! Yeah I said it, big whoop, want to fight about it? And the Oscar for best animated short film goes to...Logorama. Funny french guy accepts the award. Best documentary short film goes to...Music by Prudence. Some old white woman steals the stage. Best live action short film...The New Tenants. Fun trivia: Kevin Corrigan, the older guy who hosts the party and tries to beat up Jonah Hill in Superbad and also one of the hitmen from Pineapple Express, stars in this dramatic short. Caught that during the clip, give yourselves extra credit if you did too.

9:38pm- Ben Stiller dressed as a Navi from Avatar. Best part: his goatee poking through the blue face paint. But don't worry, he brought a hair net (nice!). And the award for best make up goes to...Star Trek.

9:45pm- Getting a little bored with these second-tier awards, so I flipped over to FOX to catch some Family Guy. Stewie convinces Brian to stroke his own tail in a sexually suggestive manner. Gotta love TV.

9:50pm- Back to ABC. And the award for best adapted screenplay goes to...Precious. Steve Martin follows up a tear-filled speech with a fantastic, impromptu quip: "I wrote that speech for him." Awesome.

9:56pm- Back to the important ones, with Robin Williams at the helm. He makes a joke about testicles, and then moves on with the nominees for best supporting actress. And the Oscar goes to...Mo'Nique. No surprises here. And to think, just last night I was watching her on Comedy Central as Cherry in the movie Beerfest. What a career! But in all seriousness, a well deserved award for a come-from-nowhere comedian turned actress. Bravo.

10:05pm- Dude, I love Sigourney Weaver. Alien, Aliens, Avatar; all fantastic sci-fi epics, all right up my alley. She is like queen of the nerds. Kind of like Carrie Fischer with a career. Anyway, the Oscar for best art direction goes to...Avatar! Dances with Smurfs-1, Big Bang Theory-1. And the battle continues.

10:09pm- A joke goes over Keanu Reeves' head. Much like the past two award winners, no one is surprised. And the Oscar for best costume design goes to...The Young Victorian. And Sandy Powell manages to give a particularly cocky and self-centered acceptance speech.

10:17pm- Baldwin and Martin get into bed together for a Paranormal Activity spoof. Much tossing, turning, sleep walking, and rolling off the bed ensues. Good stuff. Looking forward to this tribute to horror films.

10:22pm- Great montage. Tarantino liked it. I caught that From Dusk till Dawn shot some people may have missed. What a classic example of a movie that is so bad, it's good.

10:24pm- And the Oscar for best sound editing goes to...Paul N.J. Ottosson for The Hurt Locker. 2 to 1 now. And the Oscar for best sound mixing goes to...Paul N.J. Ottosson and Ray Beckett for The Hurt Locker. Oh boy. 3-1 in favor of Bigelow's war drama. Some surprises here I think. I kind of figured Avatar would take all the technical awards, and The Hurt Locker would walk away with best picture. Guess I was wrong. We'll just have to wait to see how this all plays out.

10:34pm- Some more great material from Steve Martin, introducing Sandra Bullock with a nice shot at Miss Congeniality 2. How he left out All About Steve is beyond me. And the Oscar for best cinematography goes to...Mauro Fiore for Avatar. Uh oh, 3-2 now. And this guys speaks great English for a phenomenally un-American name. Good looks, Mauro.

10:38pm- Not to take away from the gravity of honoring those who have died, but I thought this cover of the Beatles' song "In My Life" by James Taylor was fantastic. Good choice of song and musician to pay tribute to a year where we have lost way too many talented actors and filmmakers.

10:45pm- Oh how cool is this! Having street dancers perform during music from each of the nominees for best original score is a stroke of genius if you ask me. What is often a forgotten category gets a fresh and focused make-over. It's a little bizarre, but definitely works, and I love it. I particularly liked the Fantastic Mr. Fox and Avatar segments. Now back to the award for best original score. And the Oscar goes to...Up! Meh, no opinion from me here. Though I did enjoy the acceptor almost stepping on J-Lo's dress. Would have been great if we had a good ol' fashioned wardrobe malfunction.

10:54pm- Best special effects now, with beef cakes Gerard Butler and Bradley Cooper at the podium. And the winner is...Avatar. Again no surprises. And we are back even at 3-3! Hooray for heated competition!

11:01pm- Another snoozer: best documentary. Don't mean to sound insensitive towards the serious subjects of these films, but come on? Who has seen any of these besides Food, Inc. I should have DVRed this thing and started it an our late so I could fast-forward through these lulls. Yawnnnnn. And the Oscar for best documentary goes to...The Cove. Wait, was that Fisher Stevens? He was the producer on this thing? Didn't he play Iggy Koopa in the awful Super Mario Bros movie? Awesome.

11:07pm- Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin backstage in Snuggies FTW! Nice jab, Tyler Perry. And the award for best editing goes to...The Hurt Locker. Ugh, these two acceptors look like they are straight out of that horror movie montage. It's like the bride of Frankenstein and the hunchback of Notre Dame. Oh well. 4-3, the Bomb Squad. We shall see, ladies and gents, we shall see.

11:09pm- Keanu Reeves says the words "authentic" and "intense," two words that have never been used to describe any of his turns as a lead actor. Buzzinga! I think I am slowly losing my mind watching this thing. It's so long! All in the line of duty, I guess. ::Grumbles to himself maniacally::

11:15pm- Another LOL moment thanks to Baldwin and Martin. This time they joke that "Quentin" and "Pedro," the names of the next presenters, are also their pet names for one another. And the Oscar for best foreign language film goes to...El Secreto de Sus Ojos. Ok, baldy, speed it up now. Four awards to go: director, actor, actress, and, of course, best film. Now we are in the real thick of it.

11:19pm- Kathy Bates explains that Avatar is the largest grossing film of all time. Funny thing is, she is the largest, grossest actress of all time! Buzzinga x 2!! Just kidding, though I don't know what is scarier: her craziness in Misery, or the hot tub scene from About Schmidt. LOSING MY MIND!

11:24pm- Here we go, best actor time. I'm pulling for Jeff Bridges here. Tron, The Big Lebowski, Iron Man, and now Crazy Heart, this guy can do it all. Before we get to the award, though, I have to give props to Tim Robbins and Colin Farrell for two funny and heartfelt introductions to nominees Morgan Freeman and Jeremy Renner, respectively. But back to the show. The award for best actor goes to...Jeff Bridges. W00t! Love this guy, love his work. And did you know he is also the voice behind all those Hyundai commercials? The dude abides. And what a dude he is up there! He just said groovy! I love it!

11:39pm- A commercial for the iPad. Isn't it just a big iPod touch? Whatever.

11:40pm- A now on to best actress. This is a really tough call. It seems like its between Streep and Bullock, but I dunno, Gabourey Sidibe could pull the upset here. Only time will tell...just have to wade through more of these sappy introductions by the nominees' friends and colleagues. Blah, blah, blah...wrap it up Oprah...we get the point Tucci...alright here we go. And the award for best actress goes to...Sandra Bullock! I have to admit, I am actually very happy she won. Not that I absolutely loved this movie, but to go from flops like Speed 2, All About Steve, and The Lake House, to winning best actress; I mean, that's an accomplishment all its own. But then I think about her turn in Crash and now in The Blindside, I realize this is totally deserved. Congrats, Sandra, but you'll always be the wildcat from Speed to me.

11:52pm- Time for best director. What a big decision here for the Academy. Two potential firsts: a woman, and an African American. Plus, we get to wallow in the fact that Kathryn Bigelow of The Hurt Locker is James Cameron's ex-wife. Ok, sing in Streisand. And the winner for best director is...Kathryn Bigelow, the first female director to ever win in this category. And with that, The Hurt Locker pulls ahead of Avatar 5-3, and is locked in as the winningest film of the award show. But will it finish with another win for best picture and take home 6 awards total? Or will Avatar be crowned film supreme? Tom Hanks is about to tell us...

11:58pm- 10 films. One winner. And that winner, for best picture, is...The Hurt Locker! As mentioned earlier, this film, along with Avatar, was the front runner from the very beginning. And with this win, their total rises to 6 Oscars out of 9 nominations on the night. I'm sure there is a lot of analysis to go along with this win, but it's midnight, and I am exhausted from this long, arduous trek of an awards show. I have to give a special thanks to Tom Hanks for making that last presentation particularly short, and to Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin for being legitimately funny during their short time on stage. I just wish there was less rambling by the winners and less second-tier awards so that these two could have had more stage time together. And with that, I have to sign off. Predictions for next year: Iron Man 2 wins for best picture!

Foursquare.com: Turning Every Day into a Video Game

Perhaps the biggest trend in video games today is the "achievement" system. Originating on Microsoft's machine, and subsequently making its way to the PlayStation 3 in the form of "trophies," achievements are little awards that gamers win by completing tasks in games, but that exist outside of those games, and are displayed alongside the player's online profile which can be viewed by friends and competitors. Achievements can be awarded for completing a wide variety of tasks. Some are tied to the main game, such as beating a certain boss or completing the game on a specified difficulty level. Others are more specialized, like accumulating a certain number of head-shots or defeating five enemies with one grenade. Achievements have taken the gaming world by storm, and keep some of the more determined of us tied to our televisions, trying to track down every last one.

Now, some of our less-gaming-inclined readers might be saying to themselves, "what the heck is the point?" And in a sense, their concerns have some foundation. These achievements award gamers with no tangible benefit. They don't make your in-game character any stronger, or give you any advantage over your competitors. In reality, they are merely merit badges that gamers get to wear on their online profiles. But they do have some value, if you briefly suspend your non-gamer cynicism. Primarily, they provide for bragging rights. Just like you would show off a trophy for winning your bowling league or your award for getting the highest grade in your class, a gamer would similarly tout his trophy for completing Metal Gear Solid 4 on the highest difficulty without once being detected by the enemy (an extremely difficult feat, let me assure you). Secondarily, achievements provide for greater replay value in games, giving players a reason to go back to a game they may have completed and play through it in a different way. And in an economy where most games cost $60, the more time you can spend playing, and thus the more bang-for-your-buck you derive from your purchase, the better.

This trend has not stayed within the realms of the gaming world, however. One website has recognized the addictive quality of these achievements and is now using a similar system to their advantage. The website is called Foursquare.com, and is one of the fastest growing trends on the internet. Foursquare functions as follows: the first step is to download the Foursquare application to your GPS enabled smartphone (and who doesn't have one of those these days?). Then, as your travel to different real world locations and establishments, boot up the app on your phone. It will detect your location through your GPS, which then allows you to "check in" at that location. These "check-ins" can be posted to Twitter or Facebook to let your friends know where you are. Also, while you are checked-in to a certain location, you can submit tips for use by the next user who checks in there. For example, if you check in at a bar, you gain access to all the tips left by people who  have previously checked in there, informing you about everything from drinks specials, a particularly tasty appetizer, or some hilarious scribblings on the wall of the third stall in the ladies' restroom. And that pretty much describes the user experience in its entirety: go places, check-in there, read some tips, leave some tips, go somewhere else, check-in, read some tips, leave some tips, etc, etc.

Some of you are probably asking yourselves, "what does this have to do with achievements?" And to that I say, "sheesh, give me some time, I'm getting there so just keep your pants on." ::clears throat:: To add some much needed depth to the user experience, the creators of Foursquare included a clever "badge" and "point" system. As you check into places, you gain points which are tied to your personal account. Checking in to the same place multiple times in one night, or discovering a brand new place never checked into before, award you different amounts of points. Users also accumulate badges, which are pretty much identical to the achievements found in the games mention earlier. For example, the "super user" badge gets awarded to any user who accumulates 30 check-ins in one month. The "local" badge gets awarded to any user who checks into the same place 3 times in one week. The "adventurer" badge gets awarded to any user who checks into 10 different locations. Much like video game achievements, the primary purpose of these badges is bragging rights. And, also much like video game achievements, they prove quite addicting, and have turned many users into compulsive checker-inners.

But Foursquare goes one step further, adding legitimate, real world value to these badges. By far the most coveted badge is the "mayor" badge, awarded to any user who has the most check-ins at a certain location than every other user. For example, if you have checked into the deli down the street more times than any other user, you become the "mayor" of that deli. This creates a sense of competition, giving users motivation to keep revisiting certain places in order to rack up the check-ins. Clearly, this is beneficial for the owners of these establishments, as it increases foot traffic. To make the deal even sweeter, certain participating establishments give benefits to their respective mayors. Participating bars offer free drinks to whoever is the current Foursquare "mayor" of that location. Similarly, many coffee houses offer free cups of coffee to their "mayor." This takes the achievement system that is so addicting in video games and takes it to the next level, and has so interesting implications on new marketing strategies. For example, I can imagine a promotion run by a big chain like Starbucks, where they give Foursquare users six hours to check into as many different Starbucks locations as they can, and whoever makes it to the most will win a gift card. 

It's all very interesting stuff, and I wouldn't be surprised if these video game achievement systems spread into other types of media. And whether you see its value or still think it is pointless, that fact of the matter is it is growing fast, and may soon take over your life without you even knowing it.

1,000 Hits!

Wow. It seems like only yesterday I was announcing that Poposaurus REX had reached its first milestone: 500 hits. Now, just a few days later, we've doubled that number! 1,000 hits and counting, and it's all thanks to you, our faithful readers. Keep it up!

Drake is a Fake! And the Deputy Has Proof.

Aubrey Drake Graham a.k.a "Drake" (hehe his first name is Aubrey!) is a Canadian actor turned recording artist.  He started out on the hit show, Degrassi, which some of us know and love.  He started his career on the music scene by making mixtapes and posting them on YouTube.  One of his mixtapes, Replacement Girl featured Trey Songz and featured a "freestyle" with mentor Lil' Wayne to a remix of the song, Man of the Year.  The song aired on BET making him the first unsigned rapper who made it on to BET.  Due to the subsequent success of his other mixtapes, Best I Ever Had and Successful, he started taking over the rap game and getting airplay on MTV.  Before his album was even released he has worked with some heavy hitters: Jay-Z, Kanye (more like Kan-gay), Young Jeezy, Lil' Wayne, Missy Elliot, Justin Timberlake, Trey Songz, Mary J. Blige and Timberland to name a few.  So some could say that Drake could do no wrong.

WRONG!!!

About a year ago, Drake was asked to appear on Hot 97 radio in New York.  He came on the radio and gave a little interview and then they asked him to spit some freestyle rhymes.  For those of you that are not in tune with the rap game, an MC's freestyle is what separates the goods from the greats.  Everyone can write lyrics and everyone can surround themselves with great musicians to make solid albums.  It is only those select few (i.e. Notorious B.I.G., Tupac, Andre 3000, Eminem) that can make up rhymes off the top of their heads and still slay on the microphone.

The crowd was so amped to hear Drake spit his share and prove himself to the listeners.  He has had such hype around his lyrics and name without even releasing an album, the kid probably has a lot of talent, right?  Nope!  Someone in the studio recorded the radio session with a camera or phone and you will not believe what he captured.  DJ Funkmaster Flex lays a nice beat for Drake to feed off of and freestyle and what does he do?

DRAKE READS THE RHYMES RIGHT OFF HIS BLACKBERRY!!!!!

Don't believe me?  Check the link!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VnWPRNzd3Q&feature=PlayList&p=96E97A547F94F056&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=5

Can you believe it?  I don't know how the industry has not picked up on this blasphemer.  Not only does he read every single lyric but he even reads the hype parts of it.  Why doesn't Funkmaster Flex say anything or do anything?  Call him out!!  That is not a true artist.  If you have to read the lyrics, that's fine, but don't call yourself an MC and give credit to your writer.  Every comedian on a movie or a TV show gives credit to the writers because they are just delivering the words that are written by someone else.  They are just the vessel.  This is infuriating and annoying that this has not been exposed.

What do you guys think?  Are you as outraged as the Deputy?

Reader's Editorial: Now Taking Submissions!

Dear Faithful Readers,

We have some exciting news! After some deliberation, Deputy and I have decided to start a brand new Reader's Editorial! Once a week, we will post a new article written by one of you, submitted to us through our new email address:

poposaurus@gmail.com

Feel free to submit as many articles as you want, of any length, on the topic of your choice. Be sure to send along any pictures you want included in the post if it goes live, though we may add our own if need be. We will choose the one we like the most to be posted as the Reader's Editorial of the Week, and will credit you by real name or pseudonym--whichever you prefer. Just bear in mind that we reserve the right to edit the articles if absolutely necessary, and we can't guarantee that your submission will get posted.

Either way, we look forward to getting some fantastic submissions. Many of you have approached me and my co-author with your own ideas, so this is your chance to see those ideas come to life. Put those pens to paper, people (well, fingers to keyboards, really). Happy writing!

Sincerely,
Me